In a world rocked with violence, political strife, ethnic and religious conflict there remains a beacon of sense and balance. Look not to lip-smackers, jabberjaws or idea-pukers. Look not to market trends, media themes or hashtags. Look NOT, I say - to any person, place, thing, deity, song, mantra, -ism, motivational poster, patriotic slogan, or decal showing Calvin peeing on something.
Look to the diamond.
If you field it, wins will come.
Go the distance - to the bar before the game so that we can have fun together.
Ease the pain - of playing so very late in the evening, by drinking.
Look to the diamond.
4 sides, 4 bases, 4get that we are playing teams with insanely dopey names**. 4-2-itous bounces and stuff. 4loko might help? 4get I said that. 4mulate a game plan. 4sight the pitch onto the bat and into the field. 4ce your will upon the opponent. 4tee runs is what I expect to see in the scorebook. 4tunately you guys rule and hopefully this isn't boring you. 4non-blondes made some honest music. 4k (fourk) those other people.
ok bye - see you at the bar.
** Sweet Meat Pies / The Most Interesting Men - there can be no peace for such hopeless mopes. I mean, what the hell? 'Aw yea, it's an inside joke between us and it's really meaningful and we're BFFs' FUCK YOU and your friendship dragon you rode in on. YOU'RE NOT BASTIAN AND YOU CAN'T EVER BE!
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