The real purpose of the headline was to create a human-centipede themed play on words and sports. The conclusion of the equation = the Heat eat turds composed of several turds, making those turds the worst turds.
Also - softball at the top. Men's softball. Where we do not expect innings to end because of the person at bat. Where sliding into a base is not only expected if necessary - it's fucking awesome. Where we want to catch the fly ball, we want to make a throw across the diamond, we want to chatter about covering bases if the ball is hit short. It's where we drink to keep our minds from racing too fast in the two f...u...l......l seconds that the ball floats towards us at the plate, making a judgment call to slap it oppo or pull it on a rope. Where we challenge the defense to beat us - ripping the ball left and right of defenders and making them race into the gap to cut off the ball - instead of handing them soft grounders and lazy fly balls.
Softball. Where. We. Am. Yes.
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